[The camera begins focused in on a wobbling sheet of pale tagboard with a brightly-colored image on it in construction paper and glitter, accompanied by music -- or at least, by several people chanting "da-na-na-na da-NA-na-na-na" repeatedly.

After a moment, the tagboard is lifted away to reveal a skeptical-looking Kyon facing the camera, looking like a cranky news anchor.  He starts speaking in a bored, energyless tone of voice.]

Attention, New Moore.  New arrivals especially.  

[A rolled up sheaf of papers descends from the upper left corner of the screen and clips him behind the ear, and his narration becomes more robust.]

...

Attention New Moore!  New arrivals especially!  Due to the negligence of official channels in properly informing everyone about the exciting opportunities available to students over the summer, most of you have not yet heard of the Spreading excitement all Over the world with Suzumiya Haruhi Brigade.

Or SOS Brigade, for short.

[Dodging another swipe of the paper.]

We can't expect them to remember the long version so quickly!

In any case, the Brigade is now looking for both new members and new clients, despite not having had any old clients.  We're looking for people who have experienced something mysterious in the past, people who have run into something mysterious recently, and people who through whatever nonsensical means plan on a mysterious experience in the near future. However, please remember that a normal mystery won't do! It has to be something that wows us!

Guidelines on how to wow us will not be forthcoming.

When it comes to members, certain standard disclaimers have to be issued.  Normal humans, if anyone on this island can be termed a normal human, need not apply.  No guarantees of any particular role within the club can be given, and absolutely no information on club activities, dues, or duties will be released.  To prove your worthiness, fling yourself into mystery!

[Long sigh.]

What: Some baking at Shinji's place, not necessarily cakes but possibly.
Who: Shinji, obviously, and the very much invited Kaworu.
When: Tuesday July 23rd
Where: Shinji and Sherlock's kitchen.

(  what is a cake? a miserable pile of flour and milk! )

Now that everything's had a chance to cool down, we've sorted the longer-term releases from the brief touches on the sonar.

Releases are as follows:
AR
Ren Ichimoku
Josh Foley
Buffy Summers
Scott McCall - Edit: has returned very recently.
Equius Zahhak
Guillaume Gerard
Dick Grayson (the elder)
Bayonetta
Mikoto Mikasa


[Locked to NMPD, Coulson, Danvers//NMPD Security]
Regular shifts and assignments resume tomorrow as of midnight tonight.  Your overtime pay will be handed out - or deposited - this Friday.  If you found anyone who stuck around willing to join the force, direct them my way.  We'll get them straightened out and on the payroll.

Good job, everyone.
[End lock]

What manner of gifts are most traditional to bring for one's date if the occasion of the date is baking?

I am familiar with movies, dinners, dances, long walks on the beach, and senseless hook-ups; and the associated gift traditions of each (popcorn, chocolates, flowers, a pair of fruit-themed alcoholic beverages, and nothing but your bad self, respectively).

However, I have never been on a baking date before.