Alright, this is a stupid question for three reasons.

1. I know you lot are squeaky fucking clean as monks and the very mention of something so impure will make you gag.

2. I've explored this whole bloody island, step by drunken step.

3. The last time I got went into one of these places was a terribly fucked experience and I'd rather not repeat it!

And yet here I am, putting my foot in my mouth and asking: Do we have a tattoo parlour here?